Looking the wrong way?

Are we going about this the wrong way. We will not let people into the assembly until they fix this or that behavior…
We are very quick to point out what is wrong in the others life and not dwell on our own sin…
Jesus spent time with those that the Pharisees did not see as people we should associate with, because they were not accepted by God. Funny though God in Jesus accepted them right where they were. He did not stop at the door of the party and say, “All right all of the tax collectors must give back all the money the took over and above the tax they were to collect plus 10%. And all of the drunkards must now give up drinking and never drink again, and give a speech before each party on the evils of drinking. And all of the prostitutes must stop selling them selves to make a living, sex is a gift and can not be exploited like that.” Jesus entered the party and accepted the people as they were.
Jesus loves us just the way we are, and is loving to us to bring us out of our sin. Jesus was the only one with the woman who committed adultery who was not prepared to throw a stone, and according to his thoughts on who could throw a stone, he was the only one, yet he did not. Why not? We think well of course he did not, because that would not be how Jesus would act/react. However this is exactly what we hope Jesus will do to those who are so far in sin that they can not be welcomed into our assembly, when we tell them that Jesus will cast them into hell. If you do not turn from your sin, you will be condemned. Jesus did not condemn this women, but he loved her where she was and told her to do it no more. He spent time with her, and knew her.
We do not want to get to know people to see where they are, but just convict them of their sin.
A few years ago some wrote a book, No Perfect People Allowed. This is exactly how we need to be. No one is without sin, and Jesus welcomes us all.
Jesus entered the party, and sat with the sinners, we should do the same. Accepting them as people, and loving them in relationship .